Dear Grinch,
While I appreciate the false sincerity of your logic, I have to admit that I find this whole thing despicably underhanded. You knew I was out of the office on Monday, and you saw my name on the package. I asked you to open it because I was so excited about my toy that I couldn't wait until Tuesday to hear if it was really as wonderful as I hoped it would be. I trusted you to share in my excitement with me.
And now it's Tuesday, and I don't have a new phone, and you do.
That's not a baby duck in your hands. That's a swan. And someday it's gonna grow up and swim away from home because it doesn't belong to you.
Didn't your mother ever teach you not to steal people's toys?
~Sarah
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